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Jolly
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Hare Blessings
.
We
have FeFu & Oxy laying trail,
Will we live through it to the the tail?
Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!
They all look like FeFU one hairy-ass guy!
It is his birthday, he must hate us all
for sending us through water and shiggy so tall!
Bless these hares, bless this trail
Gators no bite us,
Snakus no scare us,
pink eye no infect us.
In the name of the flour,
the fun,
and the holy run!
On off!
Casual Friday
Hash Trash
CJRH3 Hash
#482 Hash Trash
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Hares: Fecal Fucker and Oxymoron
Wanks gathered from near and far in an exciting assortment of shiggy garb.
We were not told that we would need water wings; however, it was suggested
to leave all technology behind and not to wear clothes we would not want
destroyed. Sweet! My kind of trail! Fecal Fucker and Oxy were sure to give
us a birthday run for our money. The hares were blessed, 769 Jolly Roger H3
first timers were introduced, running shoes were double-knotted and the pack
disappeared into the Florida woods.
ON-OUT: The shiggy factor was high on the ouch scale, as we immediately
climbed through barbed wire. GRC only stopped to smell B&B’s butt while
stepping through the barbed wire adorned with some of FeFu’s hair. Some of
us ran up to an arrow that was facing the direction we had just come from.
We were not sure what it meant, as it was not a true trail, nor was it a
pack arrow, yet it was drawn using flour. Virgin 4 Life ranged and aided a
few of us FRB wankers in running in circles. While wrestling with saw
palmetto swords, some of us started making up words to a hash song in order
to disconnect our brains from the pain we were feeling from shredded
epidermis. Actually, some of us were purposely and temporarily lost; it was
our tactic to shake the continual whining from Taint Tickler. If he did not
look so much like he could put a hurtin’ on me, I would have slapped the
boogers out of his tickler just to shut him up. After climbing what seemed
to be the same friggin’ log repeatedly, some of us hooked up with Gritty
Kitty on the 69th circle of log-hopping. She led us to the rear-end of the
noisy pack who found another patch of palmetto blades to shred what was left
of our skin.
ON-IN: We found out what the backwards arrow meant, after we breast stroked
through the 169-foot deep water shiggy. Seemed all wankers except for Lost
My Balls, had missed the first part of trail; and Yankee Crank was sure to
point it out to everyone within earshot. I do believe a few wanks were ready
to swipe his old man walking stick and beat the crap out of him with it. We
arrived to the parking lot, which was the start, the beer stop, and the
finish. I would say we all did a very fine job of short-cutting, as we made
it back before the hares and sundown. It was BONUS that the beer van was
there waiting for us. Lost My Balls almost killed us all when he found out
he was the only one who went through 369 package checks on the first half of
trail; he said he got tired of looking at his own junk and wondered where
everyone was.
CIRCLE UP: FeFu and Oxymoron did a fine job of haring FeFu’s birthday hash,
as there were only a few thumbs pointing to China during trail trial. DUI
said the water wasn’t deep enough (he’s 169 feet tall) and Dabadoo got his
Spiderman panties wet. Goolight Special filled their drinking vessels and we
were entertained by many virgins. Nurse Jelly Finger entertained us while
getting her blowjob (sweet photo op!), Toyz in the Hood was tied up for 10
JRH3 hashes, and Gritty Kitty was tied for 25 JRH3 hashes. Lost My Balls was
the FRB for the beer stop (duh, all other wanks missed it) and Bloody Z won
the hash and the 1,069 pound chain. Goo was honored for her work in the
kitchen and Taint peed in the Brainless skull to cleanse the vessel. Choice
of a New Penetration won the brainless as well as a spit-squirt from the
hares. Just Liz received her hash name and henceforth, from now and
forevermore, until we decide to change it, she will be known as YMCA (Young
Men Cum Again).
A fantastic time was had by all and the hash went in peace.
On-On!
Casual Friday .
Jolly Roger
H3
of the Tampa Bay Metro Area
Runs #482
FecalF*cker's B-Day Hash
Saturday, August 1st, 2009
Where: Meet in the parking lot on the south side of Morris Bridge Road, on the east side of I-75, across from the entrance to Trout Creek Park, in Temple Terrace, Florida.
When:
Directions:
From I-4 & I-275, in Central Tampa:
From Wesley Chapel, to the north:
From Brandon, to the south:
From Lakeland, to the east:
From Carrollwood, to the west:
Trail:
Hares:
Cost:
On After: There will be a birthday party for FecalF*cker, at the on after. The on after will be at ShotByAWhore's house, located at 8701 Elmdale Place where there will be free food and a keg of beer provided by FecalF*cker. To get there from the starting location, go left, or west on Morris Bridge Road/Fletcher Blvd, left, or south on I-75 for about 1 mile, right, or west on Fowler Blvd, at Exit 265, for .9 miles, left on Morris Bridge Road, right on Davis Road for .7 miles, left on Elmdale and find 8701 on the immediate right. Click here for a map.
Phone Number: