JRH3 Trail #1519
Wed, Apr 14th, 2021
Hazukashii's 29th JRH3 Lay
Facebook:
https://fb.me/e/3BkYKRlvr
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Hare Toast
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Here's to Hazukashii
He's our hare
His 29th JRH3 lay is live
In case you care.
So try to catch the hare
If you can
But you'll have to be faster
Than this here man
Its going to be dark
So please carry a light
Because this trail
Will be at night
Repeat After Me!
Coppus no catchus
Doggus no biteus,
Hare do delightus
In the name of the flour
The ale
And the shitty
trail
How much time do you
need?
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Hare, RA, OnSec/Hash Cash,
FRB, FBI & Brainless Award Winner (Basic Hash Trash)
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Hazukashii and Tainted Love were the hares, Retal Room Mate was
the RA, 2 Rung Circus and Cow Fluffer were the "running" the FRB,
FBI while Bovine From Behind and Kiss were the actual FRB/FBI. Bovine Frome
Behind was the Brainless Award winner for being gone too long. Yours
Truly, Dabadoo acted as the On Sec, Hash Cash and Beer Meister with Math Sucks
actually driving the beer vehicle to the beer stop and 2 Rung and KISS acted as
Hash Flashes.
Dab
Commentary (Expanded Hash Trash)
Two broke-dick hares led the pack on a romp around the airport. Several parking garages, a quick "what are you doing" from the plaza security dude, and a few stream crossings later, the pack (well most of the pack) found the beer stop next to a lovely Lilly pad covered pond. That was also the Turkey/Eagle split, as the walkers headed straight back, while the runners (all 2 of them) had a more scenic view (and a couple more stream crossings) on their way to the end. Twelve hashers in all, with a couple of friendly visitors from Pennsylvania (fellow PENN STATE grads at that). Rectal led a rowdy circle, Dab nodded in approval, and Meta just kept cussing at me for the water crossings. 🙂 Fun times on the JRH3. Come out next week, to say farewell and get well soon to Dab before he gets one of his tires (knee replacement) changed.
Approximate Map of True Trail
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Commentary (Expanded Hash Trash) B
But here’s what really happened:
As
the pack slowly assembled at the start (because, well, Florida drivers) a few
hardy souls braved the World of Beer for an icy cold...table. Seriously, WTF
Florida? Why must you air condition every indoor space to the temperature of a
meat locker? Oops, sorry, I digress. So after chipping the ice off our drinks we
head to start where a group of about 12 hashers have gathered including two
Justs who traveled 1800 miles just to experience a legendary Hazukashii trail!
Not one to let down his fawning fans, Haz set off. Due to the increased weight
of his flour caked shoes, he enlisted help from his soon to be lame(r) co-hare,
Tainted Love, for this. His 3300th run.
After the requisite 14 minutes and 69 seconds head-start, the hounds gave chase.
Fording streams (drainage ditches) climbing mountains (parking garages), and
breathing in the fresh air (jet exhaust), the directionally challenged pack made
their way, sweaty and parched, to the beer stop. There they were questioned by
Math Sucks, the lame gimp driver of the beer, why it took so long since they had
only run 2.5 miles. A GPS answered “cough 3.5”. After a short refreshment break,
the hounds were off again, only to find that 2Rung and Fluffer were the only
ones stupid enough to be following trail. At a water crossing, 2 Rung tossed the
FRB chain across only to lose it in the weeds. The ensuing search slowing down
the pair and saving what certainly would have been a snaring of the hare
Yes, just one hare-Tainted Love had pulled up lame at the beer stop; he then
seduced most of the pack to follow him with the promise of less trail and more
beer. Meanwhile...on the interstate...the FRBs were enjoying a game of live
Frogger.
Finally, as midnight approached, the runners made their way to the finish and
were met by the pack who had already drunk most of the beer and were lounging
about in lawn chairs. This created the rare and bizarre phenomenon known as the
combo FRB/DFL. Which basically attests to the fact it was just
another....S-H-I-T-T-Y...
Fluffer
Trail Info (actual data)
Where: World
of Beer, 5311 Avion Park Dr, Tampa, FL 33607,
https://goo.gl/maps/L85hHs89M7f9WujRA.
On Before/Dinner & Drinks: 5:30
- 6:30 PM, in World of Beer.
Check In: 6:30-7:30
PM, World of Beer parking lot.
Trail: 7:30 PM, shiggy level
TBD.
Hash Cash:
$4 for bottled water & snacks, $7 for bottled water, beer & snacks, $10 for
bottled water, beers, hard cider, hard seltzer water & snacks. Pay by cash,
check, money order, Venmo, at https://venmo.com/RICHARD-GEERS,
Zelle, or Cash App, to dab@jollyrogerh3.com,
ph/text # 813-943-4855.
Hare:
Hazukashii.
On After: World
of Beer.
Who's Going So Far:
http://www.jollyrogerh3.com/Going1519.htm.
RSVP Requested: To RSVP, click on "GOING on
the Facebook Event, at
https://fb.me/e/3BkYKRlvr,
send an email to dab@jollyrogerh3.com,
or a text to 813-943-4855 (any media accepted).
Phone Number:
813-943-4855.
Printable Copy:
http://www.jollyrogerh3.com/2021_04_14-Printer-Copy.htm.