JRH3 Trail #1523
Wed, May 12th, 2021
TAINT TICKLER'S
QUAKER STEAK & LUBE TRAIL
FAacebook:
https://fb.me/e/1lK1DFyHl
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Hare Toast
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Below is the unused Hare Toast that was written for this hash.
Here's to Taint Tickler
He's our hare
Follow his trail
If you dare
His trail is dead
As you will be too
Unless you stick together
Like hasher glue
If you have a light
You can't go wrong
It will help to find trail
So bring it along
You can borrow one from the beer van if you need one
Repeat After Me!
Coppus no catchus
Doggus no biteus,
Hare do delightus
In the name of the flour, the ale
And the shitty trail
Which way is
on out?
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Hare, RA, OnSec/Hash Cash,
FRB, FBI & Brainless Award Winner (Basic Hash Trash)
.
Taint Tickler was the hare, Hazukashii was the RA and the FRB, KISS and/or
O4Whore were the FBsI and Taint Tickler won the brainless award for various hare
crimes. Yours Truly, Dabadoo, acted as the On Sec, Hash
Cash, Hash Flash and Beer Meister, while Taint drove the beer truck. All in all it was just another SHITTY TRAIL.
Dab
Commentary (Expanded Hash Trash)
We were all excited for Taint Tickler’s trail (well, at least I was), a 30 year
hasher with experiences in many different countries. We gathered in the empty
parking lot, with TT’s candy van already there, but we had to wait until about
15 minutes prior to hounds away for him to arrive after pre-laying the trail. He
told us how amazing the trail was going to be, and he clamored about labeling it
a Korea trail (HASH, HASH, HASH) . . . ask him about it sometime.
We had six faithful hounds on trail, three running, two walking, and of course
Dab on his bike. TT pointed us to the first mark, and we were on out. Hitting
the sidewalk on US 19, we ran up to the first onramp/offramp to find the first
check. 2-Rung checked strait, and finding nothing, I looked right, going over
the onramp/offramp lanes to look on the other side . . . nothing. Going farther,
I eventually found a plop of flour about 200 meters away, and followed it . . .
for another 150 meters before finding the next plop, next to an intersection.
Checking back across the road, I found a true trail arrow . . . pointing towards
me rather than going forward. Back tracking, I found another arrow, up on US 19.
As depicted in yellow on the trail map, TT took trail up the off ramp from the
first check, up along US 19 (which is a 6 lane highway) at rush hour, across a
bridge, then turning left and back down where I found trail. Hmmm, an unusual
tactic, but now we are on trail and going in the right direction. Gathering up
the pack, that by this time was spread out all over around that first check, we
cut across a field and turned right, to find the hare laughing at us. WTH?
Trail followed the road back into the neighborhood for about a mile, passing a
perfectly good shiggy opportunity on a power line, only to continue on the
sidewalk. Somewhere in this area, Math Sucks and Dab reported the sighting of an
errant true trail arrow pointing off in the wrong direction. I should also
mentioned that by this point, I wondered about distance between marks, so did
some pace counting . . . yes, marks were averaging between 80 and 110 meter
apart. Hitting the midpoint of trail, we turned left through some grass, and
then turned right info a scrub brush area along a chain link fence. Dodging and
ducking branches, trail eventually passed under the fence at a gap near a
drainage ditch, then continued to follow the fence to once again find a true
trail arrow pointing back at us (sort of pointing into the pond nearby). We
found marks circling back around, and continued on. At this point, we are headed
back to the power lines of shiggy, to find TT waiting at the beer stop (and
getting his first ration of sh*t from the pack).
After the beer stop, trail continued up the road, and a true trail arrow pointed
right, up the next street, but because our hare had used 1 pound of flour for
each mark (that’s an exaggeration, but he did use almost 15 lbs on this 3 mile
trail. I will not be surprised if HAZMAT is called out today to investigate the
massive plops of flour as people get up to go to work) we could easily see he
just did an out and back (as depicted with the second yellow line on the map)
going the other way. We then passed the Harley Davidson dealership (with a live
band playing 2-Rung), crossing a 4 lane road with a cop cruiser sitting there,
with one plop on the side walk. Checking left and right, finding nothing, we
plodded (well, make that two of us plodded) into the shiggy next to a fence,
(the best part of the trail I might add), that took us back into the parking lot
where we started. Meantime, the lovely ladies of the hash decided to skip that
last shiggy part and walk around the block (their loss). As the pack gathered at
the finish, we all ended up sitting around in a circle, and with no RAs on hand,
it was given to me to proceed.
And we did, all still sitting around the circle, as you can see in the pictures.
Circle was short and sweet, Taint Tickler scored the Brainless Award (along with
another ration of “constructive criticism”), as you may have already suspected.
KISS got her 10 run streamer, and Haz got his 30 hare tag. Closing the circle,
Taint stated the on after was at the Lube and Steak around the corner, so 4 of
us went in for dinner while the rest went home. Many thanks to Taint Tickler for
haring, but we hope our comments guide your efforts on future hare activity.
That's my story, and I'm sticking to it . . . but I encourage the other members
of the pack to chime in on their recollection of trail.
Hazukashii
Approximate Map of True Trail
Trail Info (actual data)
Where:
Quaker Steak & Lube, 10400 49th St N, Clearwater, FL 33762 https://goo.gl/maps/L5C1LjBqcBka8ocf7.Check In: 6:30 - 7:30 PM,
in the parking lot behind the closed down business, just NW of the LaQuinta Inn, at 10525 US-19, Pinellas Park, FL 33782, https://goo.gl/maps/V4qEah33UQ7xbJvL8. Its 0.2 mi NW of Quacker Steak & Lube, https://goo.gl/maps/ky2g9yNzTB7Q9HdX6.Trail:
7:30 PM, 3+ mile, shiggy level 3 (1-5 scale with 5 as the toughest), http://www.jollyrogerh3.com/Shiggy%20Meter.htm.Hash Cash: $4 for bottled water & snacks, $7 for bottled water, beer & snacks, $10 for bottled water, beers, hard cider, hard seltzer water & snacks. Pay by cash, check, money order, Venmo, at https://venmo.com/RICHARD-GEERS, Zelle, or Cash App, to dab@jollyrogerh3.com, ph/text # 813-943-4855.
On After:
Quaker Steak & Lube.
Who's Going So Far:
http://www.jollyrogerh3.com/Going1523.htm.
RSVP Requested: To RSVP, click on "GOING on
the Facebook Event, at
https://fb.me/e/1lK1DFyHl